I don’t have a bucket list. I’m “only” 53 and hoping not to kick the bucket any time soon, but my kids think I’m ancient, so perhaps I should make one. My list will, I’m sure, be full of predictable things like “visit the Taj Mahal” and “get my book written and published,” and it will also have notable absences such as “try skydiving” (why not? Because, I say, why jump out of a perfectly good airplane? That would just be silly.). But I’ve been thinking about it, and I’m not so sure I want to make a bucket list. There are lots of things I want to do with my life, but they’re not all the sort of quantifiable things that I could just tick off and be done with (as satisfying as that would be).

On New Year’s Eve, someone asked if I had any resolutions. I don’t usually come up with any because I’d rather enjoy chocolate than get fit, but I wanted to say something, so I blurted out “I want to make more stuff for people.” And I meant it – the words came out because it’s what I really want to do and I didn’t stop to overthink it. I love to make things – not high art, maybe, but useful and beautiful things that people can use and enjoy and maybe even think of me when they do so. I’m not an expert at anything in particular – more a ‘jack of all trades, master of none’ – but the advantage of being 53 as opposed to 23 is that I’ve had a few years to learn stuff and practice. I can make patchwork quilts and crochet and cook and bake and sew and embroider and weave and do a bit of calligraphy. And there are lots of other things I’d like to learn, like pottery and silversmithing and glass blowing and screen printing and woodworking and knitting where one sock doesn’t turn out twice the size of the other (which is what actually happened when my grandmother tried to teach me).

I do like to keep some of my creations, but there is nothing so satisfying as making something for someone and giving it to them and seeing them enjoy it. And that word, “enjoy,” has a lot to do with it – I want to give them joy. The whole point of this life, I think, is to connect with people – to encourage, gladden, support, enjoy, and love each other. Making things is a way to express love and appreciation, and as well as helping in practical ways, it can help make connections.

Case in point: For my 40th birthday, my late stepmom surprised me with a big, cozy quilt that she had spent much time and effort making – a complex pattern with the theme of books and libraries in just the right colours for me and my living room. There’s a label on the back – “made with love for Allison, 2012, KM” – and you can find me most evenings curled up on the couch, warm in my quilt, feeling the love of a woman who died of cancer but is still very much a part of my life. A wise friend asked me what I think Kathy’s legacy is, so that I can pass it on to my kids and to others. It took only a few minutes for me to realize that her legacy is love and her expression of it through the things she made for people.

This, therefore, is my bucket list: Make stuff for people. Bring them joy. Love them well.